Quality vs. Quantity

I learned an important recovery lesson this week. Just because someone has a lot of sober time doesn’t exactly mean that time has been quality time.  It was pointed out to me that people sometimes are sober and not drinking but, are just as miserable as when they were drinking.  I had to tell myself, man don’t be that guy!  Today an individual shared he knew a guy who had 20 years sobriety only to commit suicide.  It took me back and made me pay attention, I definitely don’t want that.  So how did this happen I asked?  Well, I was told that this individual went to meetings sometimes but did nothing else to work his program.  Therefore his alcoholic thinking came back and he again found himself hopeless.  He did none of the things we’re taught to do in this program.  He knew he couldn’t go back to drinking because that wouldn’t work and he couldn’t stand himself while he was sober either.  It just drives the point home to me to stay very close to the program and to talk to other alcoholics and my sponsor daily.  I’ve heard it said many times that I suffer from alcoholism not alcoholwasm.   I was also told to learn from everyone in those meetings.  Take the good from peoples programs and try to emulate them and learn from the bad of others programs and try not do those things in my recovery.  I deal with a disease that is cunning, baffling and powerful and without the help of my Higher Power, my Sponsor and the program it’s way too much for me.  I was also told that unsolicited advice is often an attack on one's program, don’t give unsolicited advice.  I need to remind myself  to work my program, focus on me and my recovery and keep my side of the street clean.  Hell, my best thinking earned me a chair in the rooms.  So I need to ask myself 4 things, is the thing I’m about to do: Honest, Pure, Unselfish, and Loving.  If it’s not all of those things, I don't need to be doing it.  So what I’ve learned this week is mind my own business, learn from others successes as well as their failures, focus on right now and make my time the best quality that I possibly can.  That way I can have both Quality and Quantity in my Recovery. 

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